Column of the Day – Gerrison Keillor

The voice of Lake Wobegon offers his account of the RNC:

I must say, it was fun having the Republicans in St. Paul and to see it all up
close and firsthand. Security was, as one might expect, thin-lipped and gimlet-eyed, but once you got through it, you found the folks you went to high school with — farm kids, jocks, the townies who ran the student council, the cheerleaders, some of the bullies — and they are as cohesive now as they were back then, dedicated to school spirit, intolerant of outsiders, able to jump up and down and holler for something they don’t actually believe.

Let’s see, a new home or. . .

. . . a new outfit for the RNC? Vanity Fair estimates Cindy McCain’s outfit at $300,000. 

Oh. My. Goodness.

Tonight’s “entertainment” – Gretchen Wilson, Big or Rich (not sure which one), and Cowboy Troy, who is actually reciting part of the “I have a dream” speech. Surreal. 

Palin’s Big Moment

She’s a confident speaker. Does an Ecclesiastes-type riff: “There’s a time to campaign, and a time for leadership. . . ” I have noticed, however, that when she gets excited, her pitch reaches a rather high level. A bit of “Fargo” from time to time. 

Okay, media ethics question for you: If you don’t want your children to be part of the media’s attention, why call so much attention to them during your speech? Does that open the door for questions from the media? 

Wait – her husband is a “proud. . . union member”? 

Now the small town talk – cue John Mellencamp, please. 

Cut to youngest daughter smoothing out Trig’s wispy hair – she’s adorable. But why put them on camera?

Ah, there’s the comparison between mayor and community organizer we’ve been waiting for. Who is to say that the latter doesn’t have responsibilities? Then she drops the phrase that could haunt Obama – the “clinging to guns and religion” line. 

Red Meat Special

10:25 PM: Wow. Rudy delivers. Red, raw, dripping with blood. It’s not politically correct, it lacks quite a bit of logic, but that doesn’t matter to this crowd. “Can you imagine how they’re going to shake up Washington?” 

Rudy claims the Dems (Obama’s staff) have questioned Palin’s ability to serve as VP and be a mother of five. Problem with that statement: Obama’s camp has NEVER said anything to that effect. 

And we’re back!

10:00 PM: Rudy Giuliani’s turn, complete with a NY sunset in the background. “This is the most important election of our lifetime, and we’d better get it right.” Just before he took the stage, the cameras focused on Bristol and Trig Palin – they didn’t ask for this attention, and I feel for them.

Rudy compares electing a president to hiring someone for a job. “Who am I going to hire?” he asks. Then he begins a rundown of each “resume” – the third time in 24 hours that we’ve heard about McCain’s service and suffering. McCain is a hero for his service, no doubt. Now Obama’s experience: an Ivy League education (that’s a bad thing?), work as a “community organizer” (and lawyer, and college professor – but he doesn’t mention that). 

MSNBC and others keep harping on whether or not each speaker is bringing the “red meat.” Can we retire that term already?

And, like last week’s “surprise” appearance by Obama after Biden’s speech, we now know McCain is in the building, ready to take the stage following Palin’s debut. 

“Barack Obama has never lead anything – nothing, nada!” And Rudy says Obama is the “least experienced candidate” in at least 100 years. Sort of like, um, I don’t know. . . Abraham Lincoln?

Convention Audience Participation 101

MSNBC’s Ann Curry just pointed out how female delegates are being moved toward the stage and men are being moved out, just in time for Palin’s appearance. This isn’t unusual, or underhanded, but it does indicate how scripted the conventions – of both parties – have become. 

The Return of the Live Blog – RNC Edition

9:31 PM: “I’m a Republican because I didn’t want to grow up poor, waiting for the government to rescue me.” Very effective line. But then he claims Palin “got more votes running for mayor. . .  than Joe Biden did running for President of the United States.” Gets a loud response, but it makes no sense. First major example of logical fallacy tonight. 

9:25 PM: One of the better public speakers, Mike Huckabee, is up. Second speaker in a row to mention the “elite media.” Well, at least they’re no longer liberal. Elite, after all, means the best, right?

Huck drops a Madonna joke into the speech. He is a genuinely funny guy. His praise for Barack Obama’s historic candidacy gets tepid applause. Then claims Obama brought back “European ideas” after his recent tour. Are we supposed to fear the ideas of our allies now? I’m a bit confused. 

9:13 PM: “USA! USA! USA!” And the backdrop looks like the world’s largest Windows Vista screensaver. Romney gets the crowd fired up with comments about defeating “radical Islam.” More defeated Republicans are coming up. Stay tuned.

9:05 PM: Romney is up, out of the gate and – OH! – he stumbles on a punchline. Reminds me of Barbaro at the Preakness. He adds a bit of the call and response stuff that made a number of Democratic speeches unbearable last week. He just called the Dems the party of “Big Brother” – has he read 1984? 

Preview of Palin’s Speech

Found here at the National Review. She’s taking it right to Obama (my italics):

“I had the privilege of living most of my life in a small town. I was just your average hockey mom, and signed up for the PTA because I wanted to make my kids’ public education better. When I ran for city council, I didn’t need focus groups and voter profiles because I knew those voters, and knew their families, too. Before I became governor of the great state of Alaska, I was mayor of my hometown. And since our opponents in this presidential election seem to look down on that experience, let me explain to them what the job involves. I guess a small-town mayor is sort of like a ‘community organizer,’ except that you have actual responsibilities.“ 

Grrrrr. . . no powercord, therefore. . .

. . . no live blogging tonight’s RNC. A better, funnier substitute is Dave Barry.